So here, finally (two months later) is our September holiday diary!
After a very difficult and sad summer, we made the decision to take a last-minute short break rather than our traditional week-long summer holiday. We were looking for somewhere laid-back and tranquil to allow us to unwind and find some peace for a little while. Faithful travelling companion came up with the idea of a few days in Carcassonne in the south of France. This seemed like a very good idea, particularly as there were direct flights from Glasgow. Although when I say 'south of France' you automatically think of the French Riviera (and one of our most-loved holiday destinations ever, Nice) but Carcassonne is situated inland, rather than on the Med, and it's close to the the Spanish border and the Pyrenees.
The first thing you notice is that Carcassonne Airport is very small and I immediately nickname it 'the portacabin'; there only appears to be about 4 flights in and out of there every day. But of course the important thing is that we have arrived somewhere where it is still actually summer. At home, we have had reasonably decent weather by our standards in September (16-18 degrees) but on arrival in Carcassonne the temperatures were in the mid to high 20s, and the sun was shining in that beautiful blue sky.
After a bit of a wait at (slow/diligent, delete as appropriate) passport control, it's time to take the shuttle bus into the city. There is a special shuttle bus service leaving shortly after every flight arrival. It's a reasonably short journey into the city and the bus drops off passengers at several key stops, firstly in the 'new city' and the 'medieval city' - Cité de Carcassonne.
That's right - Carcassonne is a 'tale of two cities' although size-wise you couldn't really describe them as cities! We cross the river Aude and then it is uphill to the fortified medieval city. The final stop is just a short walk from the Porte Narbonnaise - one of the "gates" to the medieval city. I took this picture of the Porte Narbonnaise later in the week:
The place is absolutely mobbed with tourists. We weren't expecting it to be quiet, but as we cross the 'drawbridge' and entered the medieval city we are greeted by a flood of people making their way through the narrow cobbled streets. But we (and our suitcases) make it through and eventually check into our hotel.
It quickly becomes apparent that the Cité is unlike anywhere we've ever been on holiday or are ever likely to go. There is something almost unreal about it - it's like living on a film set, yet it is very real indeed. The citadel is a UNESCO World Heritage Site, and it's over 2000 years old. Of course there has been significant restoration work undertaken over the years, but who cares? After a very short time there, it's very clear that the Cité is going to be one of our most memorable holiday destinations we've ever been to.
A very important aspect of all our holidays is of course the food. So after unpacking we head out in search of our evening meal.
One thing we observe very quickly was that the place has significantly quietened down since the afternoon. Where have all those tourists gone? Certainly not to the restaurants, that's for sure. As we set out to explore the medieval city's eating places, we notice that many of them hadn't bothered to open. Was this just because it was Wednesday, I wonder? But it wasn't long until we find somewhere with a particularly appealing menu.
Being back in France for the first time since 2012 means only one thing - the return of soupe à l'oignon - onion soup. Both faithful travelling companion and I agreed that this may well have been the best onion soup ever.
Our main courses are also very good too, and they are washed down with some Minervois. Languedoc-Rousillon is serious wine country - as we saw during our descent today, flying over fields and fields of vineyards as far as the eye could see.
After a very enjoyable dinner we do some more exploring of the Cité. It is extremely quiet, and the same goes for nightlife too. There isn't any! But we are not here to party, so that's no problem. But one thing we do enjoy on holiday is sitting outdoors to enjoy those warm late summer evenings, which you just can't do at home (unless you want to risk hypothermia).
We come across Place Marcou, a little square packed with restaurants/bars on all sides. However most of these are either closed, or closing earlier than what we've previously experienced on our holidays in France over the years. We manage to find one which is still open. The geographical proximity of Carcassonne to the Spanish border means....sangria! So needless to say I have to try it out. We then head back through the quiet streets to our hotel. I think we're going to love Carcassonne....
This is one of those books which seems to have been around in the public consciousness over the past couple of years.
I was curious to read it as it looked like a change from the usual Nordic Noir genre which has filled bookshelves over the past few years (to saturation point at one stage).
If you're familiar with One Foot In The Grave and its infamous grumpy protagonist Victor Meldrew, or indeed Coronation Street's neighbourhood watching nosey parker Norris Cole, then you will recognise a lot of the characteristics of Ove, the lead character here.
Just when you've quickly got Ove sussed as the grumpy old man in suburbia, railing at everything the modern world has to offer. To begin with, the intolerant grump is not easy to like - but Backman then takes us back to the character's younger years and his early life and the circumstances which came to form his personality and develop his moral code. This helps us to understand the reasons why Ove is the way he is. Ove did find happiness with Sonja, the great love of his life. After her loss, Ove realises he has nothing to live for; there follows a series of darkly comedic (and thankfully unsuccessful) attempts to end his life. Over the course of the book, new neighbours and characters enter his life - uninvited of course! - and they all turn out to have a very surprising impact on the lead character.
I guess that one of the lessons from this book is that (apologies for the book metaphor) you should not always judge a book by its cover, and that first impressions are not always accurate. There is much more to Ove than you first thought. For me, this book was also about the values of love, friendship and respect, and seeing good in people. In an ideal world, I hear you say, and well, this is a work of fiction after all. But in a world where hate is the standard currency and hope and compassion is in short supply, we need to be reminded that goodness still exists.
My favourite books are generally non-fiction, I'm not really a fan of fiction but can honestly say this is one of the best books I've read in a long long time. This book moved me to tears at several times, however Backman has the talent to quickly turn the tears to smiles and laughter. Maybe it's because I was reading this book during a summer characterised by serious illness and bereavement, when my emotions were already shredded to pieces, but it's impossible not to be moved by this book. I notice that it has been made into a film - with Rolf Lassgård perfectly cast in the lead role - but I don't think I'll be going to the cinema to see it as I will probably blub all the way through it. And let me tell you, I'm not one of those people who cries at films either. Best to wait for the DVD I reckon :)
The list of participants in this year's FiK was recently announced but I haven't had the time to write about it until now.
There is going to be a change to how Albania chooses its song for ESC 2016 as the public will be partly involved in the voting process for the first time ever, alongside the jury vote.
No dates have been announced as yet, but it should probably be around Christmas time as usual.
Here are the 24 participants and their songs, Big news is that two of my favourite FiK performers of recent years are back, back, back! Rezarta Smaja has been a very familiar face in recent years at FiK and I can't wait for the return of Linda (Lindita) Halimi. Since she blew us all away with her debut performance in 2014, Lindita has gone on to compete in American Idol but was sadly eliminated in the earlier stages of the contest.
Albulena Jashari –Fjalët ia lë zemrës
She's a very modern young artist, her music seems to be very "current" and judging by "Bashke", her latest video clip, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1SzP3E1B4wk could she be the Albanian version of Poland's Margaret? If so, stand well back, because we could have a fanboy stampede here!
Classic Boys – Dashuria për jetën
OK so here we have an operatic trio discovered on X Factor Albania. An Albanian Il Volo - will the viewers or juries feel "grande amore" for them I wonder?
Dilan Reka – Mos harro Another former X Factor Albania contestant makes a quick return to FiK after last year's debut. I wonder if he will come back with a more modern song?
Edea Demaliaj – Besoj në ëndrra And here we have yet another graduate of X Factor Albania - only this time she actually won the competition.
Edona Vatoci – Mirëmëngjës
For this post I've been looking at some YouTube clips of the artists and she looks like one of this year's more interesting performers.
Elson Braha – Edhe një herë Another more "modern" performer but with a wide variety of styles. I'd like to see him bringing something catchy, upbeat and ethnic like this Kenga Magjike song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xyb4EPnBkFI
Erlind Zeraliu – Dhimbja e gëzimit If the Classic Boys weren't enough for you, here comes another tenor. Expect him to "serve some serious operatic realness" as the young folks say.
Fabiola Agalliu and Agnesa Çavolli – Shkon e vjen
Fabiola has a nice jazzy tone to her voice, as indeed does Agnesa. Again this could be an interesting one, although I worry that the guitar solo may come from an acoustic guitar rather than an electric one...! Both have appeared on The Voice of Albania which is yet another fertile breeding ground for FiK contestants.
Festina Mejzini – Atje lart
She's certainly glammed up her image between X Factor Albania and this year's Kenga Magjike. I'm sure that appearing in a current contest will have raised her profile sufficiently to boost her chances in FiK.
Flaka Krelani – S’dua t’flas
Now here is the big-voiced diva who single-handedly keeps the Albanian cosmetic industry in business. I didn't really like her song in last year's FiK but she has quite a good song in this year's Kenga Magjike - "Rebelohem" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=857NP1G5bow I hope her FiK55 song is as good.
Franc Koruni – Macka
Another artist currently in Kenga Magjike. Listen to him sing without looking at him - you'd think it was a grizzled old blues singer (or a Cat Stevens soundalike) when in fact he is just a young man. It'll be very interesting to see what he brings to FiK. Genc Salihu – Këtu
At this stage, the one most likely to have a guitar solo. Linda Halimi – World
Really can't wait to see what Linda/Lindita's going to do this time round. I think it's brilliant that she she replies to her fans on Twitter too (myself included). Her Twitter name is @LinditaWorld so how appropriate that her song is called World! Hoping fully it will be a great song and performance and she will go on to represent Albania in ESC, then everyone can live in Lindita's world...!
Linda Rukaj – Vija e lumit
From one Linda to another, this time a France-based Albanian singer-songwriter who plays acoustic-style music. Not my thing as you know, but she may surprise us. Lorela – Me ty Unfortunately I don't know anything about this particular Lorela as I searched on YouTube and there are many Albanian singers named Lorela!
LYNX – Sot
It's a band. Expect guitar solos. Luka and Serxhio Hajdini – Koha plaket
Luka is a New York-based artist and singer while her brother Serxhio appeared in The Voice of Albania. Neki Emra – Dashuri dhe urrejtje Could we be getting some Albanian EDM, Europop or a big ballad? I really don't know what to expect from this guy.
Orges Toçe – Shi diamantësh A wee bit of gruff-voiced Albanian rock is sure to go down well with the juries.
Rezarta Smaja – Pse prite gjatë
Haven't heard anything from her since her duet with Klodian Kacani in last year's FiK but I can only guess that it will be yet another ballad or mid-tempo number showing off her vocal talents. I've seen clips of her singing pop and rock on YouTube and it would be nice to see her doing something different in FiK for a change.
Tiri – Më zgjo
Not sure if this is the same Tiri from The Voice of Albania. If it is, we can expect some pop-rock.
Yll Limani – Shiu Just when you thought we'd exhausted The Voice of Albania for FiK singers, well here's another one. Yll seems to specialise in a more modern, 'urban' sound. Modern doesn't always do well at FiK but could this be the year that changes?
XUXI – Metropol
I searched on YouTube and again I'm not sure if I have the right one! This one definitely fits into the FiK rock remit though.
Xhesika Polo – Eva jam unë
So we end the list with yet another talent show contestant, from the same series of X Factor Albania as Classic Boys. I've watched a few of her clips and I really think she could be a contender if she gets the right song.
With very few exceptions this year, FiK features a younger group of singers which suggests a move towards, dare I say, musical modernity? But before we throw our hands up in the air at the idea of tropical house in FiK (perish the thought!!) we have to remember that FiK is one of the last bastions of "old" Eurovision, with the orchestra and the conductors (although the sidelining of the conductors last year didn't please me at all as I didn't get to see much of you-know-who) and like Sanremo, it follows its own rules. Bring. It. On!
Who'd have guessed that the biggest story in British TV over the summer would have revolved around a TV baking contest? Since its humble beginnings 6 years ago, "THE GREAT BRITISH BAKE-OFF" (BBC1) has gone on to become one of this country's biggest ratings smashes and the format has been sold all over the world.
It was all good news for the BBC then, or so you would have thought. Only problem is that the BBC didn't own it - an independent production company named Love Productions did. And then, this September, they sold it to Channel 4 for a new 3 year deal...and all hell broke loose. It turned into a Twitterstorm and a media frenzy. It wasn't just about a TV show moving to another channel: it was a story of loyalty, and principles, and dough. Hosts Mel and Sue, who are a huge part of the show's personality (and of course the all-important innuendo) have chosen to stay with the BBC and in their words, not to 'follow the dough' whilst judge Mary Berry is also staying at the BBC. Her co-judge Paul Hollywood is however going with the show, and the dough, to Channel 4.
It's highly unlikely that the show will have the same level of success after its move to Channel 4: with the break-up of the winning formula of presenters, judges and - crucially - no ad breaks - it's hard to imagine anything else but an inferior product.
In the meantime, the 2016 series (the final one to be broadcast by the BBC) was another massive success. As with every year's intake, it featured an incredibly talented group of bakers who were all winners in their own way. But the visually inventive bakes by Candice - she of the eye-catching and ever-changing lipstick colours - reminded me a little of the baking creations by Frances Quinn who won the 2013 series, so I wasn't all that surprised when she took the title. That's the thing about GBBO - it's a feelgood show, gentle, charming and warm, where each weekly elimination is almost apologetic. In an increasingly nasty world, we need all the escapism we can get. Whether Channel 4 can replicate that atmosphere of warmth and mutual respect, well I guess we will have to wait and see, but I fear the worst.....
Whilst I'm on the subject of GBBO, and TV reality/talent competitions....Of course a staple (and tedious) cliche of the reality TV genre is "the journey". But in the case of last year's GBBO winner, Nadiya Hussain, it turned out to be very appropirate, When Nadiya first appeared on GBBO she was a shy and uncertain baker who didn't know just how talented she was. You'd never have believed that she would turn out to be such a natural TV presenter. "THE CHRONICLES OF NADIYA" (BBC1) - love that pun, by the way - was a very interesting two-part documentary which saw Nadiya take a trip to Bangladesh to explore her family's roots, traditions and of course, food.
Nadiya is an articulate, charismatic and likeable young woman, and a particularly positive role model. So I wasn't surprised to see the BBC signing her up for more TV work.
If I was inventing my own ideal TV presenter, likeability would be near the top of the list. Yet it's a very rare aspect of many of those overexposed TV presenters who dominate so many of our shows. How many of them are really likeable and approachable? Hmmm....let's think....
While you're thinking I'd just like to suggest that Si King and Dave Myers a.k.a. The Hairy Bikers are two of the most likeable TV presenters of the last few years. Their latest cooking travelogue, "THE HAIRY BIKERS' CHICKEN AND EGG" (BBC2) did what it said on the tin and sought out recipes and cuisines from the UK to France, Morocco, Israel, the USA and back to the UK, exploring along the way how chicken is becoming the world's most popular meat (and the only meat which your almost-vegetarian blogger still eats). Watching their show is like hanging out with a couple of warm and funny old friends who are talented cooks too!
Since the demise of TV Burp and the failure of the Stars In Their Eyes revamp, we Harry Hill fans have been waiting for the great man's return to our screens. "HARRY HILL'S TEA TIME" (Sky 1) is a spoof cooking show and let's face it, you wouldn't be long for this world if you took some of those "recipes" seriously!! Each week features a special guest star (GBBO's Paul Hollywood, pictured above with Harry) .Whilst I'm very happy to see him back on TV, I continue to have mixed feelings about this show. It's packed with a lot of the surreal comedy, daftness and songs which made TV Burp such a hit - a trio of Delia Smith lookalikes singing a Smiths song every week, for example! - but this show also misses and misfires as much as it succeeds, and I find it funny and infuriating in equal measures.
Needless to say that after that referendum, there were lots of programmes over recent months about Brexit. But notably most of these ignored the fact that the majority of Scottish voters chose to remain in the European Union. Until "SCOTLAND AND THE BATTLE FOR BRITAIN" (BBC2) in which Andrew Marr finally had the opportunity to explain our political differences to the rest of the UK. That situation is so complex that it would take much, much more than an hour's TV to explain, but Mr Marr did pretty well to at least go over the basics.
Now on to something a bit more frivolous....autumn means the return of "STRICTLY COME DANCING" (BBC1) and it became very clear, very quickly, that there is a very high standard this year. But Strictly being Strictly, the headlines are often made by those with two left feet. This year's John Sergeant/Anne Widdicombe is the former Labour MP Ed Balls, who has also achieved notoriety in the Twittersphere over recent years thanks to "Ed Balls Day" which commemorates him tweeting his own name. Yes. But Ed is also making some progress - yes, it's that "journey" again! - and he is actually learning to dance. On the other end of the Strictly spectrum we have Hollyoaks star Danny Mac who is putting his previous dance experience to good use; TV presenter Ore Oduba is a strong contender (that jive was one of my favourite dances of this series), and Louise Redknapp is also very good although her dancing is still lacking in personality.
So far, no fauxmances/showmances to speak of, which I'm sure must be a major disappointment for the tabloids, but there has been plenty of controversy in the early weeks of the show, such as the departure of Will Young who had been one of my favourites to win. My own personal favourite at the moment is little Claudia Fragapane, the Olympic gymnast. I expected a lot more from her fellow Olympian, long jumper Greg Rutherford - he just needs to loosen up, lighten up and let go, and he could become a contender. At the moment though it's hard to see past Danny Mac for the win.
Forget X Factor - the highlight of my Saturday night is catching up with the previous night's "DOOBIDOO" (SVT) which recently came back for another series and continues to do very well in Swedish TV ratings.
It's a very simple format. Swedish singers/actors/TV personalities compete in teams of two in various rounds of music questions interspersed with archive TV clips and the whole thing is held together entertainingly by host Lasse Kronér (pictured above).
Another new show which recently caught my attention was "EN KVÄLL I NEW YORK" (SVT), a 4-part series where several of Sweden's best-known singers took a trip to NYC to perform at the world-famous Apollo Theatre, backed by a top gospel choir who also perform on the Late Show. So, no pressure then!
Week 1 featured Roger Pontare, Darin, Titiyo and Sweden's latest worldwide sensation Zara Larsson. It was a very entertaining hour: special mentions to Roger's encounter with a stylist, and Darin's reunion with Kat DeLuna ("Breathing Your Love") along the way. Oh, and on a shallow note here, Darin is still hot. It was funny though, seeing the choir's reaction to the "murderer" lyrics from the choir in "Lovekiller"!
In week 2 it was the turn of Sarah Dawn Finer, Andreas Lundstedt and Linda Pira to meet the choir and band. For Andreas it was a new take on "Crying At The Discotheque" whilst Linda chose "Knäpprar Mina Fingrar" and Sarah interpreted "For A Friend". Unfortunately I didn't see the rest of the series as I had discovered it pretty late and by the time I got round to the remaining episodes they had been removed from SVT Play. Well done SVT for bringing this new fresh musical format and giving these very talented performers their moment on that iconic stage. I can only envy Swedish TV channels for trying out music-themed TV formats over recent years, which don't just involve the talent-option (apart from TV4's Swedish Idol).
Talking of which, I haven't been following Idol this year: I have too many other things to watch, and too much to do. The show's had a revamp with an all-new jury of Fredrik Kempe, Nikki Amini and Quincy Jones III (pictured above).
It was time for another episode of "THE PEOPLE'S HISTORY OF POP" (BBC4) an occasional and very enjoyable series which takes a look at a particular 10 year period through the experience and anecdotes of the people who were there - the fans. The latest episode covered the period from 1976 to 1985 - personally a very exciting and incredibly diverse time for music from punk, new wave and 2-Tone to the new romantics and The Smiths. In the same way that BBC Radio 2's "The People's Songs" played the longer game in exploring the soundtracks of people's lives, so there was potentially a longer and more detailed story to be told; this series could potentially have focused on a different year rather than a decade for every episode, but I suppose we should be grateful for whatever we get.
Another terrific recent documentary which should probably have been watched in conjunction with "The People's History of Pop" was "BOY GEORGE'S 1970s: SAVE ME FROM SUBURBIA" (BBC2), another very personal look back at an influential decade, which was not perfect; industrial unrest, unemployment, economic gloom, and an EU referendum. Sounds familiar, but at least the music was a million times better than what we have to put up with in the "tens".....Anyway it was very entertaining and it was interesting to see George catching up with a couple of old friends, namely Marilyn and Martin "Sigue Sigue Sputnik" Degville.
BBC1 had a little nostalgia trip by reviving a few classic sitcoms and bringing them up to date. "ARE YOU BEING SERVED", that classic department store-set slice of innuendo and double-entendres, didn't really float the critics' boats. But it was very well cast, I thought, and in a time when Mrs Brown's Boyd is so popular (although the critics detest that too!) maybe it could have succeeded with a longer run? But the very old fashioned setting of Grace Brothers suggests that this sitcom should just have been left in the 70s after all.
However the most successful revamp was "PORRIDGE" which will now get a new series. Glad to hear that, as the pilot was pretty good. This time round, Fletch's grandson (played by Kevin Bishop) is in prison, and it will be interesting to see where they take the character from here.
As I said in a previous TV review post, I'm watching TV a bit differently these days and take a long time to get round to watching series! So I have still to see the revived series of Cold Feet, series 2 of Humans, 30 Degrees in February and The Code. I guess that's my homework for the next few weeks then...!
The Grand Final of the 61st Eurovision Song Contest. If the slick and highly entertaining semi-finals are anything to go by, the final should be a good one. Over recent years, the host cities have all tried to come up with new ways to give the show a spectacular introduction. Stockholm 2016 put their own stamp on the proceedings with a "fashionable" start - a catwalk parade, to a soundtrack of Swedish dance music's superstars like Avicii and the Swedish House Mafia. From the TV pictures, Globen looks stunning and is the perfect venue for such a massive event. Mans and Petra make their entrance, Mans in a midnight blue tuxedo and Petra in an off-the-shoulder glittery dress. Petra: "When we reach the end of the show in 3 to 8 hours..." Mans: "...I can eat carbs again!" Mans highlights that Europe is going through dark times at the moment - and this is pre-Brexit referendum, folks! - and he also salutes the fans. Petra also throws in a reference to : "I was at a party and none of the guys came on to me".
BELGIUM: "What's The Pressure" - Laura Tesoro. A lively opening to yet another producer-drawn running order. Laura is in a glittery jacket and shorts. There's a background of discs and the whole presentation of the song has certainly come on so much since the Belgian national final. One song in and the crowd are already very excited. The vocals are a little bit off in places, but Laura's youthful enthusiasm carries her through. The backing singers/dancers join her on the satellite stage at the end.
CZECH REPUBLIC: "I Stand" - Gabriela Gunčiková.
Gabriela does indeed "stand": on Prague's Charles Bridge in the postcard, and there's no movement from her on stage either. Graham Norton says that there are a lot of solo women belting out Euro ballads tonight. My main criticism of the presentation is that we see a bit too much of the pink/blue/purple geometrics, nice though they are, but not enough close-ups to build a better connection with Gabriela. She is a good singer though, probably better than the song if I'm honest. She takes her hair down in a wind machine finale, and that's it really.
NETHERLANDS: "Slow Down" - Douwe Bob. The postcards this year could be subtitled "ESC stars and their pets". And in a tribute to Father Ted, Douwe presents his lovely horse in the postcard. Firstly I want to declare a personal interest here. Because I have placed a number of small bets for the final and this was one of them, so I really want it to do well. This is a good old fashioned ‘real song’ which you only need to hear once to remember. Mum would have liked this to start with, I think, but she'd then probably have turned up her nose after two minutes and said it was too repetitive. Lyrically though, this song probably sums up my life over the last few months.
It starts with the ticking clock on the floor. The gold and blue staging is easy on the eye, as is Mr Bob himself, although I have an issue with him closing his eyes when he sings. The 10 second silence is only slightly less embarrassing than it was in the semi-final. This time he whispers "I love you". He greets the fans and the song ends on the satellite stage. A wink to the camera and it's over.
AZERBAIJAN: "Miracle" - Samra.
Miracle is a very apt title here, as the miracle is that the best of the singing is being done off-screen by the backing singers. Samra's vocals on the other hand have been anything but miraculous, and her vocals are atrocious on the second verse. She looks better than she sounds, I like the catsuit (and I think faithful travelling companion might like her). And as the words 'Azerbaijan' and 'understated' are never usually uttered in the same sentence at ESC, there are pyros, pyros, pyros.
HUNGARY: "Pioneer" - Freddie.
Freddie is reasonably easy on the eye and visually reminds me of an older (rougher!) version of 1D-era Zayn Malik. So he's getting some appreciation in the looks department, but this is the first of the Chandelier-a-likes this year and it just does nothing for me. This song has never really appealed to me at all; I know what he’s trying to do, but it's man-Sia by numbers and his voice is just too croaky. I can't make out most of the lyrics either.
Hungary, along with Iceland, is one of those countries which I eventually want to win Eurovision, but this is not the song to do it with. Oh, and here's another song with a drum. Have I woke up in 2005 or 2006 or what? He also has foot-stamping backing singers, and extra points from me for having visible backing singers. The end result is far too shouty for me and I can't understand why it made the final.
ITALY: "No Degree of Separation" - Francesca Michielin.
Big cheers from the fans at the beginning of the song. Let's go down the garden centre! The garden-themed staging isn't to everyone's taste but I rather like it. Although it took me a long time for this song to click with me, I'd have to say that her subtle yet passionate delivery of the song is rather spellbinding and the whole thing is filled with quiet wonderment. One thing completely ruining it is the on-screen 'splashes' - totally offputting and unnecessary.
ISRAEL: "Made of Stars" - Hovi Star.
Aah, the understated Hovi - only joking of course! Graham Norton describes this song as one of the better ballads. It's yet another faultless vocal performance from Hovi who completely makes a connection with the viewers. Personality-wise, if Hovi was a website he would probably be Wiwibloggs (!) but we get a deadly serious performance here and he delivers a terrific vocal.
Since I first heard this song I always thought it was reminiscent of "Molitva" Hovi also gives us the back-to-the audience shot. There’s drama. There’s a pyro curtain. And…there are two acrobats in a hula hoop which is completely unnecessary and another example of the everything-but-the-kitchen-sink approach which is characterising so many entries this year. Hovi is emotional by the end of the song: "The dreams that you dare to dream really do come true". Indeed they should.
BULGARIA: "If Love Was A Crime" - Poli Genova.
In a time where ESC entries are moving away from mainstream pop, this is one of the few pure pop entries this year and succeeds thanks to the charisma and likeability factor which the lovely Poli brings to the song. In the early stages of getting to know this song I struggled with the chorus. Oh tie me looser? Oh tiny loofah? Oh I'm a loser? None of these actually and of course we know it's really "O, day mi lyubovta" - extra points from me to Bulgaria for throwing in a little bit of native language. For me, this is Bulgaria's best ever ESC entry to date.
She’s been one of the biggest stars of the 2016 pre-contest tour circuit. She certainly has an appealing personality and likeable stage presence which, combined with a catchy, uptempo pop song, has brought her lots of approval from the fan community. There are lots of glittery lights and holograms, and just when you wondered why she was wearing that futuristic outfit (which doesn’t really go her any favours) – then her outfit lights up and it all makes sense.
The backing vocalists join Poli on stage for the final chorus. (I’m fed up with the backing vocalists being hidden away on so many of the songs).
Just before song 9, a emotional tribute from Graham Norton to Sir Terry Wogan who passed away in January 2016 - one of many, many famous people whom we have said goodbye to in this dark year. Norton said that Wogan had given him this advice - "don't drink before song 9"..."Raise your glass to Terry, the voice of Eurovision".
But back to the contest, and there are huge cheers in the arena for the home team.
SWEDEN: "If I Were Sorry" - Frans.
If you needed evidence of "the haters" infiltrating our Eurovision community, look no further than Melodifestivalen 2016. After this song was selected as this year's Swedish entry, I was quite appalled to read many of the hateful remarks about the song and the singer. So it's not to everyone's taste, and it is a blatant copy of "Catch and Release", but it was probably the only song prior to this year's contest which made any impact across the continent. Flippin' eck, it was even played on BBC Radio 1.
This song keeps the minimal staging from Melfest with the golden lights, whilst the audience are all waving lights too. Frans looks a little bit tense but finally appears more relaxed by the 2nd chorus. The whole thing is maybe too minimal to give Sweden a 2nd consecutive win, but it is certainly worth a top 10 place.
Break time, followed by another of the Big 5.
GERMANY: "Ghost" - Jamie-Lee.
Before this, Graham Norton makes some rather stupid, ill-informed comments. He clearly doesn't like this song. Maybe I've just watched too many clips of her and have become desensitised to Jamie-Lee's very individual style, her Carmen Miranda-inspired headgear and knee high socks combo. Jamie-Lee is lovely and distinctive and expresses herself through her individuality.
But as I said at the time of the German national final, the styling may just be too much for the one-off casual viewer watching the final and I thought many of them would just spend the song talking about her 'look' rather than the song itself. Which isn't that bad actually, although it doesn't break new ground.
FRANCE: "J'ai Cherche" - Amir.
Now, Graham Norton likes this one. Amir himself is a major selling point for this song - he brings bucketloads of charm and energy and this is one of the most accessible French entries ever, smoothly mixing French and English with positive results. Amir looks good and appears likeable. He is also a dentist. Oh well, nobody's perfect (only kidding, apologies to all dentists reading this!)
The staging isn't particularly spectacular but the song is extremely catchy and it sails along on Amir's charisma and that all-important likeability factor.
POLAND: “Color of Your Life” – Michal Szpak.
Firstly, he has fantastic hair. Secondly, this song is not “Cool Me Down” by Margaret, arguably 2016 national final season's most overrated fan-favourite. (I never really understood the obsessive love for “Cool Me Down” by the way, and I’m happy to discuss that whenever I’ve got a few hours to spare). Michal gives a faultless performance and there is a key change. It's an old-school ESC ballad and I think my mum would have liked this. The red lighting in the audience is also used to good effect. My main gripe with this song is the color-without-the-u. I don’t know what “color” his life is, but his nail polish is black. Another break. Måns has sneaked off to the Tele2 arena next to Globen, and has an ever so slightly cringeworthy interview with Carola and Loreen. Carola milks her embarrassing moment with a quick rendition of Hallelujah, only for that to be thankfully brought to a close. Loreen meanwhile is slowly but surely morphing into the bride of Frankenstein. (!)
AUSTRALIA: "Sound of Silence" - Dami Im. Graham Norton had made some negative comments in the days leading up to ESC about Australia's participation. But Dami's performance should have had him eating his words. Although I wasn't really a fan of this song in the lead-up to the contest, I was eating my words too as like many others I was bowled over by Dami in the semi-final. Of all the Sia-wannabe songs in this year's contest this certainly is the most authentic, and certainly in it to win it.
After just 2 years in the competition, Australia are showing everyone else up with the high standard of artist and performance, and they have set the bar extremely high indeed.
CYPRUS: "Alter Ego" - Minus One.
The band give a confident performance of this Killers-esque song written by the one and only G:son. It's a very welcome departure from the norm for Cyprus this year and I hope they go on to send more rock-influenced songs to ESC - why, they could be the new Turkey!
Graham Norton is starting to annoy me tonight, Can we please have a more knowledgeable commentator?
SERBIA: "Goodbye (Shelter)" - Sanja Vucic ZAA.
Sanja is bringing Bond-theme attitude here, and she fights off the male dancer to illustrate the domestic violence theme of the song. In the national song presentation and in pre-contest parties season, Sanja certainly impressed with her vocal versatility and likeable personality.
This is one of my favourite songs this year. As evidenced by the national song presentation and her numerous appearances on the pre-contest tours this year, Ms Vucic can certainly sing a bit. And at least she is not styled like an old woman, as in the song presentation show – but for some reason they’ve got her and her singers done up like kick-ass warrior princesses ready to repel the bad guys, including fighting off her dancer.
Unfortunately the staging of the song commits this blogger's Ultimate Eurovision Crime: the dreaded modern/interpretive dance. But I still have a very high opinion of this song and Sanja's performance of it, it is one of my favourite songs of this ESC season and will figure in my end of year chart. Serbia always give “good backing singer”! Powerful, moving and amazing.The backing singers join her towards the end of the song in a kind of Molitva-gone-Mad-Max way.
LITHUANIA: "I've Been Waiting For This Night" - Donny Montell.
If you're playing Lithuanian stereotype bingo, then the postcard delivers.
Donny Montell still sounds as if he should be a Vegas cabaret singer. “Ladies and gentlemen….Mr Donny Montell!”
Donny's left his blindfold at home but he's brought a perm! He also brings lots of energy with this anthemic pop tune which taps into the EDM-style pop which continues to dominate the charts.
He somersaults. There are a lot of lights. And Donny throws in that ‘back-to-the-audience’ shot which is becoming quite common this year.
And regardless of the theories for the country's frequent qualification to the final, it must be said that Donny certainly sells the song and owns the stage in his performance of this uptempo Swedish-composed song. He's a little like a permed Danny Saucedo (!) in his white leather jacket, and he leaps off a small platform for the song's finale.
CROATIA: "Lighthouse" - Nina Kraljić.
The minute Nina took to the stage in the semi-final she instantly became the very obvious frontrunner in the Barbara Dex awards this year. More than any other 2016 entry, the ridiculous styling has crippled a song's chances in a way not seen since Moje 3 in 2013. After the first chorus, the tree-cloak is pulled away to reveal another dress which quite frankly isn't much better. She's surrounded by backing singers dressed like hooded monks, to give it all an air of mystery. Before the contest I couldn't really understand this song's popularity, but after watching her in the semi-final I "got" this and it turned out to be a lot more appealing than expected....although the song's appeal for me was short-lived as it just leaves me cold in the final.
RUSSIA: "You Are The Only One" - Sergey Lazarev.
In his introduction to the song in the semi-final, BBC4's Scott Mills mentioned that there is “desperation in the air” – whether you like, love or hate this song, I thought that was a little bit unprofessional for a commentator. Although it has to be said that Russia are definitely pulling out all the stops to win with the most ambitious staging of the of year, a technically accomplished piece which has Sergey literally climbing the wall onto a sonic iceberg before going off into the stratosphere.
I do have a soft spot for Sergey though, as I first discovered his music on Rachel and Keira's much-missed "Sounds of Europe" in the early years of this blog. And you've just got to love someone who runs a dog bakery called "Poodle Strudel". There has been much talk before this year's contest about why Russia is likely to win/why Russia must not win etc. I'm not going into those debates here and only judging the songs. Many have called "You Are The Only One" 'old-fashioned': it's an uptempo song with an easily-remembered chorus. If that's old-fashioned then I'm quite happy to be old-fashioned too.
SPAIN: "Say Yay!" - Barei.
One of the pre-contest fan favourites, even if it didn't find so much favour with native language purists, Like I said, call me old-fashioned but I like my Spanish entries in the native language and to have a distinctive and catchy Latin feel; but I also understand the argument though for a more modern English-language entry to boost Spain's standing in the contest, "Say Yay!" was a mediocre winner of an extremely disappointing national final with a generally poor selection of songs.
In the Grand Final, it doesn't do anything to change my mind.
The backing vocals are weak on the verses. And then Barei goes into the Barei Shuffle. And then...she falls. But in Blue style she "gets back up again" - it's all metaphorical I guess? - to perform the rest of her party anthem. She does her best with what she is given, but I feel that the overall picture is of a song and staging with nothing to make the random voter take notice and vote for it.
Oh, and can we have Alvaro Soler or Pablo Lopez representing Spain one of these years??
Now ladies and gentlemen... it's Justs time.
LATVIA: "Heartbeat" - Justs.
In his introduction, Graham Norton mocks this and I am very angry. Anyway I'm too busy tunelessly singing along with this to provide any critical analysis at this time. As in the semi-final, Justs gives it his all. The ground "crumbles" around him and Justs throws himself around and then some! The minimal industrial-staging goes very well with the cold, stark beats of the song.
"Heartbeat" is of course written by last year's Latvian representative Aminata Savadogo and I much prefer this to "Love Injected"; both songs do however have something in common in that they have a stark minimal modernity which seems to go down very well in the modern ESC (see also "Rhythm Inside") and at one point during national finals season I even began to see this as a possible winner. But in the end I was very happy to see it even just qualify to the final, Justs is very appealing, but it all gets a bit too shouty towards the end.
UKRAINE: "1944" - Jamala.
The turmoil experienced by Ukraine over the past couple of years, most notably the annexation of Crimea by Russia, meant that they understandably did not take part in ESC last year. I was surprised to see the country return so soon.
Rewind to earlier in 2016, and I'm sure that many of you will have watched that national final which felt as if it went on for days. Those 20-minute commercial breaks! :) Politics and national identity also characterised the final, whether it was some of the jury members' comments about some entries, and most importantly the subject matter of the song which was to go on to win that national final.
"1944" seems to be on a different playing field from this year's other entries due to the theme of the song, which is derived from the deportation of the Crimean Tatars in that year, including the singer's great-grandmother. However it is easy to draw a parallel between those historical events and what is happening in Ukraine today. The lyrics are very telling: "When strangers are coming/they come to your house/they kill you all/and say we're not guilty". Certainly a long way from the boom bang a bangs and diggiloo diggileys which haters of this contest still continue to think that's what it's all about.
Anyway, Jamala ramps up the intensity from the beginning. Wearing a midnight blue dress and trousers, she puts everything into her performance. Emotion, anger, sadness and loss. Prior to the final chorus, the golden roots which sprouted across the floor of the stage blossom into a tree of life and the stage changes to blood-red. Jamala completely loses herself and lets out that scream of pain and anguish and leaves the viewer in no doubt about the meaning of this song.
As actual 'songs' go, it isn't really much to write home about, and has virtually no commercial potential, but for sheer emotion and power it has no competition.
MALTA: "Walk On Water" - Ira Losco.
This Swedish-written (Molly Pettersson Hammar co-write), and rather generic, pop song - and possible Melfest reject I guess - was a fan favourite for a while but like most of the other fan faves this year, it does nothing for me. There has been some criticism of Ira's outfit as in "she's pregnant so she shouldn't be wearing this kind of thing" however I think she looks great and should be able to wear what she wants.
There is a dancer on stage doing that whole interpretive-dance nonsense and do you know something? Laura is now off to the kitchen and the potato wedges are going into the oven...
GEORGIA: "Midnight Gold" - Nika Kocharov and Young Georgian Lolitaz.
Winner of my Best Band Name at Eurovision 2016 - or possibly of any other year! Graham Norton is less than favourable about this song, but I feel it deserves its place in the final. Georgia is one of my favourite ESC countries because of the diversity of entries it sends - and to hell with the consequences. I get the feeling that NK and YGL really don't give a flying *bleep* about appearing in ESC, but allow them, they deserve this moment. Stop bitching Mr Norton, it's not nice.
Apart from winning my prize for best band name of ESC 2016. Secondly, one of them looks like a hybrid of Liam and Noel Gallagher. And thirdly – all hail G:son! The staging is just perfect for this type of song. There are lots of flashing lights and the kind of visual effects which might have turned up on a 70s TV rock show, with multiplied band members on stage. There is very clever camera work to showcase the band, and the song builds up with a frenzy of flashing lights.
As for the song, I never really listened to it too much before the contest but think I might listen to it a bit more now. I’m glad we still have entries like this in ESC. It’s particularly interesting that the two entries which G:son is involved in this year are both ‘rock’-type songs rather than the schlager-pop he is best known for.
AUSTRIA: "Loin d'ici" - Zoe.
After the sensory onslaught from Georgia, we move on to the the very excited Zoe, a cross between a Disney princess and a modern-day Vanessa Paradis, There is a very pretty stage set to match the sweetness of the song. I was glad this made the final as (a) it's in French - a real risk choosing a song which isn't the main language of the country, and (b) it's got a whiff of 'old Eurovision' about it.
Zoe has lots of charisma and the crowd love her - listen to those cheers. A popular finalist, and once upon a time (to continue the fairytale theme) this would have been a winner.
UNITED KINGDOM: "You're Not Alone" - Joe and Jake.
Drum roll.... here come this year's lambs to the slaughter, I mean the United Kingdom entry. The postcard has J and J hanging out in the Cavern Club, at the football, and playing rugby. One of the co-writers of this song is Siva from The Wanted under the pen-name of 'S Kanes'.
I like the United Kingdom logo typeface too, reminiscent of mod lettering from the 60s. Joe and Jake are like a mini boyband, however the song is staged concert-style with two drummers behind them, blue and white lighting, which turns into a backdrop of selfies.
They sing well and there are no embarrassing moments. I am really proud of them, and for a moment I wonder if Europe will finally fall in love with a UK entry and we can get a place on the left hand side of the scoreboard. But then I wake up and it's back to reality.
ARMENIA: "LoveWave" - Iveta Mukuchyan.
OK, firstly this is not really a 'song', and upon hearing it I never really thought much of it. It is the kind of screech-fest which i usually like to avoid. and I didn't think she'd be able to cut it live. She wouldn't, would she? But then the semi-final happened and it was just...wow. Iveta turned out to be a vocal powerhouse with incredible stage presence. She also looked fabulous in that Beyonce-style leotard.
Unfortunately her performance and vocals in the final aren't quite up there with that epic semi-final showing, but she still owns the stage and the camera work and presentation of the song is first class. Armenia is one of those "winner in waiting" countries for me, and I think they will get their first win sooner or later. This is certainly going to do very well this year.
And that's it for the songs! There's only a couple more hours to go (ok then, maybe less than that). Petra's changed into an elegant emerald green dress.
And then something very unexpected - a quick sketch by the stars of "Vicious", Ian McKellen and Derek Jacobi. I love "Vicious" by the way! "There was no Eurovision when you were a young man..."
Voting recap follows. I'm off to vote. Then it is time for Måns to welcome a certain young man whom you may have heard of....none other than Justin Timberlake. The announcement of his guest appearance raised a few eyebrows; I was as sceptical as everyone else and would have preferred a Swedish artist rather than an American artist. But then I thought again....for a world-class and world-famous event, then why shouldn't they include a world-class guest?
Before he takes to the stage we have a fabulous interval segment. 42 years of Swedish music in 4 minutes: a 4 minute film montage of all the famous singers and bands to come out of Sweden since 1974. *EDIT: even all these months later I still play this and try to guess as many of the artists as possible. It's a great quiz!
Back to Justin Timberlake. After a blast of "Rock Your Body" (my fave JT song) he's premiering his new single "Can't Stop The Feeling!". I've always been a JT fan so you won't hear any negativity from me on this one. It's a catchy pop song which appeals to me right from this first hearing. *EDIT: the song would go on to become an overplayed staple of radio playlists over this past summer, but I still like "Can't Stop The Feeling!" and of course it always reminds me of Eurovision when I hear it.
Another voting recap and then the customary interview with the reigning Junior ESC winner. This year it's Destiny from Malta who was a deserved winner of last year's JESC with "Not My Soul".
Just when you think this fabulous Swedish presentation couldn't get any better, along comes "the ultimate Eurovision winner", which Petra and Mans promise contains all the components of previous successes. What follows is, possibly, the best Eurovision interval act of recent years - dare I say the best since Riverdance! - a song called "Love Love Peace Peace" - the perfect parody. I'm not even going to describe how good it is - all you fans out there will know anyway! Just watch the clip. SVT have given us yet another unforgettable interval act. It's outstanding.
Then it's time for Lynda Woodruff! Yes we have the long awaited return of the iconic EBU spokesperson created by the brilliant Sarah Dawn Finer. Lots of funny moments here too, from "Lady Gagarina" and "A Million Horses" to, of course "Mans Sell-me-love".
The humour continues with a spoof documentary sketch "The Nerd Nation" about Sweden's obsession with Eurovision. By the way, where can I buy those "Only Teardrops Eardrops"?
Back to the music and it's time for a certain Mr Zelmerlow to take to the stage, firstly rolling around on a hoverboard to his latest single "Fire In The Rain" and then of course reprising his 2015 winner "Heroes".
Another costume change for Petra, into a glittery pink gown. A quickly word from the persistently puzzled Jon Ola Sand - but at least we get a chuckle from him so is this a major personality shift?? It's on to the voting which begins at approximately 10.50pm UK time. This is so going to over-run, isn't it? But at least this year we've had some good value interval acts, whereas all I remember about Austria last year was, well, a lot of time-wasting.
There is a major change to the voting this year to make it all less predictable and provide a more exciting conclusion - thus avoiding the announcement of the winner before all jury votes are announced. So the Melodifestivalen model will be used this year, with the jury scores announced first and then the big finale where the televote totals are translated into points. As it's been so many months since the contest took place, I won't go into much detail about the voting - suffice to say that in football speak it was certainly a "game of two halves". By the end of the jury vote, Australia is running away with it and the top 5 is as follows: Australia Ukraine France Malta Russia The televoting is very different indeed. Australia is only 4th in the televoting, whilst Poland's 3rd place in televoting sees them leapfrog all the way from last to a very respectable 8th. The final moments are more tense than we've had in a long time in an ESC final. You can't deny that this change has made the voting much more exciting and less of a foregone conclusion.
With just two countries' votes to be announced, Australia still sit top of the table. Ukraine comes 2nd in the televote and leapfrog Australia. The tension is unbearable. Russia wins the televote, but the 361 points are not enough and they have to settle for 3rd place behind Australia and sworn enemies rivals Ukraine. Jamala wins ESC 2016 with "1944" - despite not winning either the jury vote or the televote. Will this now set a precedent at ESC where diverse voting patterns and tastes between juries and televoters will leave the door open for a surprise winner? Exciting times ahead, that's for sure. Congratulations to Jamala, for delivering a winning performance packed with pain and emotion, but you have to feel sorry for Dami Im and Sergey Lazarev, as winning the jury vote or televote just wasn't enough at the end of the day.
What happened next: "1944" did not go on to become a commercial success. The Russian media was none too happy, calling it a political victory. Ukraine meanwhile had a song contest to arrange, and the host city bidding process began. Eventually this was shortlisted to 3 cities - Kyiv, Odessa and Dnipro. After some false-alarms over the announcement dates, the announcement was finally made at the beginning of September, that next year's contest will return to Kyiv, host city in 2005. And it all starts again: countries confirming (many), withdrawing (Bosnia and Herzegovina), returning (Romania and Portugal), and a change in the rules which may allow the possible participation of associate members - there's a lot of talk about Kazakhstan, whilst Australia's participation for a 3rd year has not yet been confirmed. I'm still not convinced by the never-ending expansion of ESC - where will it end? It's a big enough contest already, but what happens when it becomes too big? I think that could end up doing ESC more harm than good. One (or two maximum) 'special guests' every year would be ok but that would be enough for me. We already have a couple of countries confirming their performers: Cyprus will send Hovig whilst the Netherlands have selected O'G3NE, a trio of three sisters, who won The Voice of Holland. Their band name is pronounced "O-Gene" but myself and many others have been calling them Oh-Gee-Three-Knee for a long time. It's going to be a commentator's nightmare! The Armenian selection process is underway. The UK will stage another national final, as will Spain and Germany. Week by week, snippets of information are being released about national final dates and/or rumoured contestants. And there was even the surprise/shock news that Albania's Festivali i Këngës has changed its rules to allow a public jury to select some of the songs! Yes, welcome to Eurovision 2017 season. It's on :))
