It's Eurovision Day!!

Tonight's the night.....and we have, what I think, is the most open and competitive Eurovision final in years, which makes it even more exciting than usual.  (If that's possible!!)

 

Just as last year, the draw's been dumped in favour of a running order chosen by the host broadcaster, which big boss man Jon Ola Sand claims will make the "best possible running order".

Ukraine
Belarus
Azerbaijan
Iceland
Norway
Romania
Armenia
Montenegro
Poland
Greece
Austria
Germany
Sweden
France
Russia
Italy
Slovenia
Finland
Spain
Switzerland
Hungary
Malta
Denmark
The Netherlands
San Marino
United Kingdom

The fact remains though, that songs in the early half of the draw don't do as well as songs towards the end of the show. 

 

 

The UK's Molly (above) has been drawn to sing last, which has caused massive excitement in the fan community, although to temper the excitement it's worth remembering that Ireland's Ryan Dolan also sang last in 2013 and came....last.  I'm sure this won't happen to Molly though: after years of has-beens, never-beens and over 60s representing the UK, there is a genuine expectation that she's going to achieve our country's best result since at least Jade Ewen in 2009, and many are even predicting "Children of the Universe" as a possible winner.  Me?  I still feel that it's lacking that certain je ne sais quoi which we expect of a Eurovision winner, but in this year where there's no obvious favourite then anything is possible. 

 

I'm very happy with the outcome of both semi-finals.  When they called out Switzerland on Thursday night I thought I was going to spontaneously combust with excitement!!  Of course I don't need any excuse for a gratuitous picture of the lovely Sebastiano.....I mean, really, how good can one man look in a white shirt and black waistcoat??

 

 

All my favourites qualified to the final, my only disappointment being the failure of "Cake To Bake" to make it out of Semi-Final 1; I'm also sad for Portugal's Suzy whose song gave us my favourite Twitter hashtag of the whole ESC season - #WAWAWEWAWE.  I'll go into more detail in my semi-final reviews which I'm hoping to publish over the next few days. 

 

What the casual viewing public don't realise of course is that the jury final actually took place last night, which would explain if an artist receives a lot of votes despite a dodgy performance tonight or vice versa.  Although it has to be said that I don't expect any dodgy performances!  The artists competing in the contest have really raised their game this year.  Eurovision's "haters" in the media and the general public find the contest an easy target to knock, but they always overlook the quality of the often excellent vocal performances in the contest.  Fingers crossed that the contestants will all deliver tonight. 

 

There's a big change this year as we're being promised more transparency by the EBU, where the jury voting is concerned.  The jury members' names were published a couple of weeks ago, and after the contest we are promised a breakdown of their votes.  We'll see how that goes.  The juries include a number of former participants, and you can find the full list at this link: http://www.eurovision.tv/upload/press-downloads/2014/ESC_2014_JURY_v3.pdf 

 

 

The UK jury is chaired by Carrie Grant (above) who has been a very familiar face on our TV screens over the last few years along with her husband David.  They are well-known vocal coaches best known to viewers for their work on Pop Idol and Fame Academy.  But more importantly, she is best known to Eurovision fans as a member of stool-sliding Sweet Dreams who represented the UK in 1983 with "I'm Never Giving Up". 

 

The voting order has also been published.  As usual, all countries who competed this year will vote regardless of whether or not they've made it to the final.  Here's the list of 2014's jury spokespersons who will be delivering the votes tonight, and there's a few familiar names in there including former contestants.  After all these years, Alcazar finally make it to Eurovision!  Not as contestants of course, but as Sweden's jury spokespersons tonight.   

 

Azerbaijan: Sabina Babayeva

Greece: Andrianna Maggania

Poland : Pauliana Chylewska

Albania: Andri Xhahu

San Marino: Michele Perniola

Denmark: Sofie Lassen-Kahlke

Montenegro: Tijana Miskovic

Romania: Sonia Argint Ionescu

Russia: Alsou

Netherlands: Tim Douwsma

Malta: Valentina Rossi

France: Elodie Suigo

United Kingdom: Scott Mills

Latvia: Ralfs Eilands

Armenia: Anna Avanesyan

Iceland: Benedikt Valsson

F.Y.R. Macedonia: Marko Mark

Sweden: Alcazar

Belarus: Alyona Lanskaya

Germany: Helene Fischer

Israel: Ofer Nachshon

Portugal: Joana Teles

Norway: Margrethe Røed

Estonia: Lauri Pihlap

Hungary: Éva Novodomszky

Moldova: Olivia Furtuna

Ireland: Nicky Byrne

Finland: Redrama

Lithuania: Ignas Krupavicius

Austria: Kati Bellowitsch

Spain: Carolina Casado

Belgium: Angelique Vlieghe

Italy: Linus

Ukraine: Zlata Ognevich

Switzerland: Kurt Aeschbacher

Georgia: Nodi Tatishvili and Sophie Gelovani

Slovenia: Ula Furlan

 

I'm still none the wiser about who's going to win, so I'm taking up my usual position on the fence and would say the winner will come from any one of the following countries: 

 

The Netherlands

Austria

Greece

Denmark

Hungary

Norway

Romania

Sweden

United Kingdom

Armenia

 

Have a wonderful Eurovision night everyone!!

 

Mum watches the rehearsal clips, Part 1

And once again, mother, you are right there, mother, and I'm about to inflict some rehearsal clips on you :)

 

As regular readers will know, my mum does not really understand my Eurovision obsession and is the classic 'casual viewer':

• she can't understand it being an almost all-year-round event.
• she doesn't feel the need to watch the semi-finals but will never miss a grand final.
• every year without fail, she will pronounce at the end of the grand final - "I'm never watching this again, it's a fix!"
• she thinks it's all too serious these days, unlike the 'old' Eurovision filled with funny people in funny costumes - the clip show fodder. 
• she thinks the Eurovision Song Contest is not to be taken seriously. 
• she thinks most of the songs are mediocre/forgettable, and can't understand why we would listen to the songs for months before or after the contest, or why anyone would want to buy the DVD!

On the other hand, my mum does like a lot of what she calls 'foreign music' which I have introduced her to over the years; and she also said that there have been a lot of good singers and good songs which have come out of the contest.  (Cue a little YouTube Johnny Logan viewing session!)

 

Her first thoughts:

 

• She didn't like the stage set at all - the 'scaffolding' and the screens at the back are "just too much" and was unimpressed by the dazzling backdrops which she thought detracted from the songs.

 

• She thought there are too many props gimmicks and I completely agree.  Whether it's Azerbaijan trapeze artists, Ukrainian hamster wheels, Romania's giant Polo mint/CT scan piano, Montenegro's skater and most bizarrely of all, Greece;s trampoline (Rise Up! *boing* Rise Up!*boing* Rise Up! *boing*) there is really no need for any of this.  As mum said, just sing the song.  Or indeed as Father Ted said, "Just play the f****** note!"  She thought these gimmicks/props did the songs more harm than good.
• She thought "Calm After The Storm" was quite pleasant.

• She liked the staging of "Silent Storm".  (It would appear that this year my mum is impressed by songs with "Storm" in the title).  I would certainly agree with her - I think the song's staging is exquisite and classy.
• "Mother".  *rolls eyes* "What the hell is that?"

 

• She liked "Cake To Bake" and said that there's not enough 'fun' songs any more in ESC.
• I then played her the full version of "Cliché Love Song" from the Danish final.  She liked it and thought it would do well.
• I played her the full studio version of "Not Alone" and her view was that it is not a winner.  She liked the first part of the song but felt the second part of the song was too harsh and ruined the song.
• I didn't have time to play "Hunter of Stars" to her, thought I'd wait till the full 2nd rehearsal clip is posted online so that she can have the complete Sebalter-on-stage-in-Copenhagen experience :)))

More to follow...

 

EDIT: sorry, there wasn't any more to follow - there wasn't much time before semi-final 1, and there hasn't been much more time since!  I'm hoping to post my reviews of both semi-finals and the final within the next few days, rather than the usual two month wait :)

 

(photos courtesy of www.eurovision.tv)

EuropeCrazy's Eurovision Preview Part 3: The Big 6 - Scooba-dooba-dap-dap-di-di-die!

Denmark: "Cliché Love Song" - Basim

When I heard this song for the first time, I got a spooky feeling when hearing it: the same spooky feeling I felt when I heard Tanel and Dave's "Everybody" for the first time, in 2001.  Which, coincidentally was the last time that Copenhagen staged ESC....yes, the year Denmark came very close to winning for the 2nd consecutive year.  History repeating? Or can they go one better?

 

There's a killer draw position (23rd in the final) and in any other year I think this would scream 'potential winner' and the only thing holding it back will be the host-country factor, as these days it would seem that people don't want the same country to win twice in a row.  It's a mix of Bruno Mars and "Scatman" and is insanely catchy.  Basim gave a well-staged, charismatic performance at DMGP and I think he'll charm viewers all over Europe.  

 

Again, this song has a bit of a Marmite factor about it, and it has as many haters as fans.  I only heard it once and it was stuck in my brain.  This for me is definitely the most instant of all the Big 6 songs.  It's contemporary and memorable - just what's needed from a 21st century Eurovision winner. 

France: "Moustache" - Twin Twin

 

Crikey, France had a national selection this year, even if it was tucked away on Sunday afternoon's "Les Chansons d'Abord" (a weekly music show which was also broadcast on TV5 over here if you've got Sky TV).  TwinTwin, Destan (Une Direction) and Joanna Lagrave (ex Star Academy) were the finalists, and we had to wait a few weeks for the result of the viewers' vote.  France chose "Moustache" - a song with a very catchy chorus and a deeper message which probably won't register with the viewers.Over the past few weeks this song has totally grown on me, and I think it will do well with the televoters. Although I suspect it will not do so well with the juries.  It has been highlighted in internet land that the verses are very influenced by the first verse of Stromae's "Papaoutai" which was a big hit in the European charts last year.  Will familiarity work in their favour, or breed contempt?

 

Germany: "Is It Right" - Elaiza

 

Some bad things happened in the German final.  A dodgy presenter.  An even more dodgy performance by Emma Marrone.  And a guest appearance by Emmelie de Forest which begged the question - is she destined to wander forever through life dressed only in beige?  Give the girl a bit of colour, she deserves it! Worst of all, I couldn't believe my eyes and ears when this unknown act beat Unheilig in a David vs Goliath final.  Unheilig would have been a brave and credible choice, and even "The Fiddler on the Deck" was better than this irritating slice of accordion-powered oompah-reggae.  The lead singer will need to have significantly improved her vocal performance since the German final if the song is to have any chance of a decent result.  You'll have guessed by now that I'm not a fan of "Is It Right" (known at EuropeCrazy HQ by the alternate title "Is It S****") and couldn't care less about how it performs in the final.  But I'm not bitter, honest.  *Goes off to play Unheilig's greatest hits followed by Fiddler on the Deck* Oh, there was one great thing which came out of the German final for me: Candy Jar by MarieMarie.  Now that would have been an amazing choice to represent Germany!

Spain: "Dancing In The Rain" - Ruth Lorenzo

 

So, we have a Spanish singer who was a UK X Factor finalist, with a bilingual song with an English title.  She'll certainly get lots of attention in the British media at the time of the contest.  It will probably get a very respectable result but it's no "Quedate Conmigo".  I think this is one of the most overrated songs this year, yes she does have a strong voice but my mum would call her a "squealer" and we're not really keen on this type of singing.  And when THE RAIN! THE RAIN! kicks in, it's more than I can bear.

 

United Kingdom: "Children of the Universe" - Molly Smitten-Downes

 

We all enjoyed playing the UK Eurovision rumours game, didn't we!  From Rylan to Geri Halliwell and what felt like a million other names later, the BBC revealed that it was turning its back on the over-60s for a new approach this year, via the BBC Introducing process. We even got a 'reveal' show, even if it was only on the Red Button channel, but I guess with the UK entries we should probably be thankful for even that.  Molly (please say she'll just be known as Molly!) is an unknown name but her vocals have already featured on the Sash!/Stunt hit "Raindrops" so she's got good vocal form.  

 

The lyrics are maybe just a bit too cliched - 'children of the universe'/'dancing on the edge of time'/'power to the people' - but on the evidence of the reveal show, she performed the song well.  And at a time when the world around us is in ever-increasing turmoil, the 'power to the people' hook could strike a chord with the televoters and juries.   Molly S-D looks like Emmelie de Forest's older sister (one of the legendary Eurovicious' 'manic pixie dream girls') and if they get the staging right it could be the left side of the scoreboard for a change!

With just days to go until semi-final 1, I am still none the wiser about who is going to win this year! *sits on fence* but I'm just hoping for great shows and memorable performances.  I'm sure that DR will deliver a great show and finally make us forget the horror that was 2001!!

EuropeCrazy's Eurovision Preview Part 2: Semi-Final 2

Malta - "Coming Home" - Firelight

It would appear though that there is only a limited amount of song titles which you can use in Eurovision.  It seems no time since the last "Coming Home" and here we are again. 

You need levels of Olympian stamina to get through the Maltese national finals process so I just had a quick look in on the final and was very pleasantly surprised by this result.  At the time I described it as Mumford and Sons meets Gary Barlow's "Let Me Go" (now if the UK had submitted that song, it would have been a runaway winner!) and all these weeks later I still think this is one of the better songs in this year's competition.  Like last year's "Tomorrow" it has a natural feelgood factor.  It could have done with a stronger chorus though, as that just consists of the title; as there is no obvious hook, I just wonder what section of the song they will use for the recap video?  (You can tell you've been watching too much Eurovision when you listen to a song and try to imagine what section they'll use for the recap..!)

Qualifier: YES

Israel - "Same Heart" - Mei Finegold

She's coming on like angry Amandine's equally angry Israeli cousin.  I preferred last year's song by Moran Mazor, and if that didn't qualify then I doubt this will either, thanks to the combination of the draw-from-hell and a little too much attitude.  I am not particularly fond of this song and consider it to be one of the weaker entries in this semi-final.

Qualifier: NO

Norway – “Silent Storm” – Carl Espen

Minimalism is not usually my thing, and this is not the type of song I go for - it's similar in mood to that remake of "Mad World" from a few years ago, which I really couldn't stand. 

However.

This is the song which will make everyone stop what they're doing and listen for three minutes.  This is chills down the backbone, raw, intense emotion.  Most of all, it seems 'real' and unforced.  Some fans have suggested that his appearance could be a drawback, but for me it actually enhances the song.  So what if his performance might be too 'fragile' - that's the song's unique selling point.  

Qualifier: YES

Georgia - "Three Minutes to Earth" - The Shin and Mariko

Georgia is one of those winners-in-waiting countries, and I wouldn't object to them winning either as they've given us some pretty good entries since 2007.   

This is not one of them. 

Georgian TV can breathe a sigh of relief as it won't be Tbilisi 2015.  Never mind three minutes to earth, it will be a three minute toilet break for me, as I'm struggling to find any redeeming features in this proggy-folk number.

Qualifier: NO

Poland - "My Słowianie/We Are Slavic" - Donatan and Cleo

This song has had a lot of attention due to its large YouTube view count.  I only recently listened to the song for the first time and on first listen, I felt this was 2014's answer to "Igranka", only a helluva lot more messy. It's a mash-up of hip hop and traditional styles, and yes it is very catchy with all the clapping going on, but if you've seen the video then you'll know that it's a little bit too risqué for the traditional Eurovision viewers.  I wonder if they will dare to recreate that on the night?  I can't see this qualifying, but on the other hand I won't really be that surprised if it does either.

Qualifier: NO

Austria - "Rise Like A Phoenix" - Conchita Wurst

Prepare for the "prepare for the wurst" puns as Miss Conchita prepares to 'drag' Austria into the final.  I think her image might polarise certain, more conservative sections of the ESC juries and televoting public across the continent but let's just focus on the song here.  It's the great lost Bond theme, it's a big old-school Eurovision ballad which would have been a runaway winner in the 70s or 80s, say.  But although it may sound dated in the context of 2014, the contest is every bit as much about the visuals/performance as it is about the vocals and the song.  Happily, Conchita has nailed both of them and will provide one of this year's major jaw-dropping talking points in the media. Regardless of her final result, this is sailing to the final.

Qualifier: YES

 


Lithuania - "Attention"  - Vilija Matačiūnaitė

Sorry to keep comparing ESC entries to other songs, but that's what I do.  In this case, every time I listen to this, I hear "I'm gonna make you, make you work" from "My Humps".   Lithuania probably had one of the longest selection processes of any country this year, and this is what they came up with?  This song is annoying beyond words, it has the worst opening section of any Eurovision entry this year, and it's like being smashed over the head with a mallet for three minutes.  Despite all that, Lithuania have a reasonably good qualifying record in recent contests, so that is purely the only reason I'm tipping it to qualify, and to subsequently bomb in the final.

Qualifier: YES

Finland - "Something Better" - Softengine

One of the first songs to be chosen this year, and it's nice to have a guitar band representing Finland.  The lyrics are a bit profound/nonsensical (delete as appropriate), but it's a catchy chorus with 'Viva La Vida'-style oh-oh-oh refrains towards the end of the song.  They are a very young band but if they give an impressive enough performance in the semi-final then I think this will be enough to qualify, helped by a reasonable draw position. 

Qualifier: YES

Ireland - "Heartbeat" - Can-Linn feat Kasey Smith

Kasey is probably one of the prettiest female contestants this year, however it will take more than good looks to convince the juries and televoters to get this one to the final.  Ireland's Eurosong final achieved notoriety for all the wrong reasons this year ("you are an odious little man!"), which overshadowed the eventual winning song.  Which probably speaks volumes, as "Heartbeat" really isn't much to write home about.  It's very clearly influenced by "Only Teardrops", which immediately destroys any of the song's credibility, and there's a bit of Irish dancing going on in the background.  And that's about it really.

Qualifier: YES

Belarus - "Cheesecake" - Teo

I watched my first ever Belarus national final live on the internet this year and dare I say it, I really enjoyed it - and even though the parade of interval acts felt longer than the actual song contest, it was a good show.  I wasn't too excited about the song to start with, but it's grown on me over the last few months to the point that I can't get it out of my mind, no matter how much I try to.  Teo's tongue is firmly in cheek (I hope), the lyrics are just plain daft, but it's going to be one of those songs in the semi final which will bring some light relief and that'll translate into televotes, although it will probably bomb with the juries. 

Qualifier: YES

FYR Macedonia - "To The Sky" - Tijana

Macedonian Pink.  This song is just a little bit too mediocre, never mind 'to the sky', it doesn't really go anywhere for me.  I would have preferred Lozano to come back this year with something more spectacular than this, and preferably sung in the native language.  She does have a distinctive image with the wacky spectacles, but that won't be enough to get this one through.

Qualifier: NO

Switzerland - "Hunter of Stars" - Sebalter

So you are probably wondering at this point why I haven't just published one but three pictures of Sebastiano Paù-Lessi aka Sebalter.  Or maybe not.  For Seb (can we call him Seb?) is, for me, the major eye candy of this year's contest.  "Hunter of Stars" is a catchy folky whistle-fest with incomprehensible nonsensical lyrics.  And I bloody well love it.  I think a lot more people will love him, and the song, too - you don't usually find the words 'Switzerland' and 'finalist' in the same sentence, but this year could prove a welcome exception. 

Qualifier: YES

Greece - "Rise Up" - Freaky Fortune featuring RiskyKidd

Winner of "A Mad Show" but will Europe go mad for this one?  Absolutely!  It's modern, it's dancey,  and it's got a reasonably hot young Greek man singing it.  What's not to like?  It's even down with the kids with a bit of rapping by Rizzlekidd, sorry RiskyKidd, and the musical feel is like a Greek take on We No Speak Americano or 'when I go bom bom bom'.  Amongst all the ballads, this will provide some light relief.  Add that to Greece's perennial ESC popularity and at least a top 10 finish in the final is a certainty.  I can't get this tune out of my head now. 

On the down side, there's maybe too much repetition of the title.  I can imagine my mum watching the final and quipping "Is this song called Rise Up by any chance"?  In fact, I'd put money on that. 

Qualifier: YES 

Slovenia - "Spet/Round and Round" - Tinkara Kovač

I always feel sorry for Slovenia at Eurovision, as they never seem to do very well, (although on the other hand I have never really liked any of their entries apart from "Stop" and "Mr Nobody") and don't seem to have 'guaranteed'/diaspora votes.  I wasn't particularly excited about "Straight Into Love" last year although it did grow on me over the summer.  Hannah Mancini also co-wrote this year's song, which is a quite nice mid-paced blend of folk and pop.  I would agree with some other fans who have noted the similarity in the tone and style of the song to "Parachute" by Cheryl Cole, but I prefer this song to that one.  It's nice, but lacks that certain special something to get it to the final. 

Qualifier: NO

Romania – “Miracle” – Paula Seling and Ovi

After 2010’s excellent “Playing With Fire” cemented the love for P and O in ESC fan world, many of us will have been delighted with the news that they were coming back this year.  High expectations, and disappointment to follow.  I would put this one up there (or down there?) with Cascada’s entry last year – the most generic form of contemporary EDM dance-pop but in the end, lacking in substance.  I didn’t like the visual presentation of this at the national final :  the visual effects were a bit too ‘meh’ for me and Ovi and Paula's vocals were just too strident and shouty.  Tone it down will you!  They will need to come up with something very special in Copenhagen, but this is qualifying regardless.

Qualifier: YES

So at the end of semi-final 2 here are my predictions to qualify to the final: Malta, Norway, Austria, Lithuania, Finland, Ireland, Belarus, Switzerland, Greece, Romania.

Coming soon, my final part of the preview, looking at the Big 5 + 1.

EuropeCrazy's Eurovision Preview Part 1: Semi-Final 1

Finally, it’s about time that I published my Eurovision previews for this year.  Regular readers of the blog will know that I’ve had some very important stuff going on over the last few weeks, and the period before my mum’s illness was also a very busy time, so there’s a very good reason why I haven’t posted until now.

It's hard to believe that it's just over two weeks to go until the first semi-final. Where did the time go since the national finals ended?  I found 2014 national finals season rather unsatisfactory as it was too 'compressed' - with hardly any activity in January, everything was crammed into February and early March, leaving us with some difficult choices to make about which ones to watch and which ones to miss. 

I managed to watch part or all of the following national finals:

·         Albania

·         Azerbaijan

·         Belarus

·         Estonia

·         France

·         Germany

·         Latvia

·         Norway

·         Romania

·         Sweden

For almost everything else, there’s the Web TV section over at www.eurovision.tv although with one significant omission – the DMGP final L

(Maybe I'm just not looking in the right place, but if anyone has a link to the full DMGP final either on YouTube or DR's website then this would be very welcome.)

So we’re finally heading into the last lap of the speculation/ranking period where fan forums and Twitter are filled with top 37s and thoughts on who will succeed Emmelie de Forest as this year's winner.  The overwhelming favourite over the last few weeks, if YouTube viewings and betting odds are anything to go by, has been Armenia’s “Not Alone”, which coincidentally is my first song up for review, as it will be the first song in semi-final 1.

 

 

Armenia – “Not Alone” – Aram Mp3

So is this the pre-determined favourite then?  Well, the guy has a great voice and I was previously impressed by his take on “Only Teardrops” which IMHO is better than the original (I’m sure EdF fans will strongly disagree!!).  This was one of the last songs to be revealed.  It starts off as a controlled and classy ballad, rdelivered in warm, reassuring tones reminiscent of, say, Michael Buble - but then goes into far too much repetition of the title in the middle of the song, which becomes a bit tiresome after a while.  Then the dramatic dubsteppy bit comes in. Pretending to be a casual viewer for a moment, I'd say that his vocals are a little too grating in the second part of the song, and there is no distinctive hook.  For this reason, crucially I still don't see this as an ESC winner.   He is a great singer though, and this is probably going to get Armenia's best ever result.  If Armenia does win, then they will succeed where the EBU have failed: we'll see the back of Azerbaijan next year, and not before time. 

Qualifier? YES

 

 

Latvia - "Cake To Bake" – Aarzemnieki

The Latvian national final is always another annual must-see.  This year's theme was "Made In Latvia" only accepting submissions from Latvian-based songwriters.  Dons was hotly tipped to win with "Pēdējā vēstule" but it was the madcap, amateurish acoustic posse, Aarzemnieki who won, and from that moment on, "Cake To Bake" has polarised ESC fan world.  This song is the Marmite of Eurovision 2014. 

There is always a daft song in ESC every year which you need to lighten the mood, and you know you shouldn't like it but you do.  (Your guilty pleasure I suppose, although I always disagree with that phrase because no pleasure should be guilty). 

Especially this year, "Cake To Bake" might just stand out among the serious ballads, and get a Kedvesem-type result; or it could be killed by the draw position and the juries will show it no mercy. I really don't know how this song will do.  I played it to faithful travelling companion, and he was covering his ears in pain after 30 seconds.  If this doesn't make the final though, I think Latvia might just pack up and leave the Eurovision game, which would be a real pity.

Qualifier: YES

 

Sweden - "Undo" - Sanna Nielsen

Sweden missed the opportunity to blast off the schlager shackles once and for all, when they failed to send Ace Wilder to Copenhagen.  OK so "Busy..." might not have been to everyone's taste but it has the international hit-quality which the contest needs.  Instead, we got a Wrecking Ball-inspired ballad written by the king of rip-off songs, Fredrik Kempe.  Sanna will no doubt give it her all but I have never been a fan of her type of ballad singing, and have never liked this song from the beginning.  The "undo my sad" line still intensely irritates me, and even if they have changed a line and added a word, well it still irritates.  Putting a donk on it usually improves a song, but I heard a dance remix and I still hated it. 

(So, Laura, I'm getting the impression that you really don't like this song very much.....!)

By the way, after all these weeks, guess what's my absolute favourite and most played Melfest song of this year?  "Red" by EKO.  It wouldn't have done anything in ESC but I think it's fabulous.

Qualifier: YES

 

Iceland - "No Prejudice" - Pollapönk

I didn't follow this year's Icelandic national finals process with the usual enthusiasm of previous years.  And before you ask, no, it wasn't because of the absence of Magni (!) I guess this was probably the right winner - it packs a lyrical and musical punch and it has a memorable singalong chorus, whereas most of the songs in the national final were just a bit 'meh'. It's a 'message' song and you can't argue with the sentiment, however I'm not sure if they will be visually appealing enough to Europe's voters.  What it does have is heart, and lots of it, and the band's natural sense of fun and lack of cynicism. 

When it comes to Iceland at Eurovision I'm very biased, as they're one of my favourite ESC countries.  So of course I'll say that they deserve a place in the final, but the realist side of me isn't so sure.

Qualifier: NO  

 

 

Albania – “One Night’s Anger” – Hersi Matmuja

 

Back in December 2013, my reaction to this winning FiK was a bit muted, as (a) she’d beaten my lovely Luiz Ejlli and (b) It was a bit of a messy song.  However in the intervening months it has grown on me, the rough edges and jarring intro have been swept aside and it’s now a more palatable floaty ballad in the style of one of my old favourite floaty ballads, “Like The Wind” (Belgium 1999).  The vocals on the studio version remind me of Shakira.  In her live performance, she needs to cut down on the facial grimacing though.  Once again, I can see Albania failing to qualify, purely on the basis of its draw position, and competition in its semi-final. 

Qualifier: NO

 

 

Russia - "Shine" - The Tolmachevy Sisters

Shine?  Oh really?  I mean, how many times has that song title been used at ESC?  So here it is again.  Are the lyrics a thinly-veiled intention of Russian expansionism, or are we getting too paranoid here?!? I know we shouldn't mix politics and musical sport, but I feel very uncomfortable about Russia's presence in the ESC this year.  Feelings about that aside, this is a pleasant enough although dated song.  As ESC modernises year by year, songs like this just feel more and more dated.  They're trying the charm offensive by sending cute blonde twins but I hope that the voters look beyond that, but qualifying still looks like a certainty.  After all, they are Russia, for goodness sake, and they've never missed a final.  Yet.

Qualifier: YES

 

 

Azerbaijan - "Start A Fire" - Dilara Kazimova

 

You can probably guess my disgust about this particular country's behaviour at ESC, bringing our beloved song contest into the gutter with their *alleged* shenanigans. 

I'm not going to focus on that this time though, and just focus on the song and singer.  I even watched the final of "Boyuk Sehne" and was quite impressed by all three finalists, although Xana Hasanova was my favourite.  As usual, it was a singer-contest final rather than a song-contest and we had to wait a couple of weeks for the usual Swedish-written composition.

I've heard this a couple of times now, and for me, it's a complete non-song, and the country's weakest ever entry.  No doubt they'll throw everything and more at the staging, but unless they *allegedly of course* get up to their usual tricks, they could be looking at a top 10 rather than top 5 position this year.

Qualifier: YES

 

 

Ukraine - "Tick Tock" - Mariya Yaremchuk

After all that's been going on in their ravaged country of late, will Ukraine pick up enough sympathy votes to take the contest back to Kiev?  I can't really see it.  I don't care enough about this song, and it doesn't do anything to change my view that Ukraine hasn't sent anything decent since Shady Lady. One thing they always do well is the staging of their songs and I'm sure that they will do the same with this, to boost its chances.  It's not a winner though.

Qualifier: YES

 

 

Belgium - "Mother" - Axel Hirsoux

My poor mum isn't very well at the moment, and as if she hasn't suffered enough I decided to play a snippet of this song to her and asked her what she thought of the song, to get the opinion of a casual viewer rather than a year-round fanatic.  She rolled her eyes several times, and then said "I don't like this".  So this one isn't getting many votes from the EuropeCrazy HQ jury, but on the other hand, remember Paul Potts and how he became a star all over the continent.  Axel could have the Potts factor, and this could have a serious chance.  When you read the lyrics without listening to the song, they are quite touching and moving, and have a universal theme.  It's just the style of delivery which is wrong, and bizarre, as Axel whacks you into submission and destroys every aspect of sensitivity which this song could have had.  I'm a bit biased against this song as I'd have preferred "She's After My Piano" to go to Copenhagen. 

Qualifier: YES

 

 

Moldova - "Wild Soul" - Chistina Scarlat

This is their 10th year competing in ESC and they've certainly given us some variety over the years. Unfortunately I missed the Moldovan final, so I don't know if this was a worthy winner or not.  No sign of Pasha Parfeny this year though: instead it's a lady with a big voice singing a dramatic ballad with little dubsteppy bits.  After a few listens, I still didn't know what to make of it.  Moldova has an excellent record of qualifying to the final, but I can see this missing out this year as it's just not special or different enough to make an impact.

Qualifier: NO

 

 

San Marino - "Maybe" - Valentina Monetta

San Marino is everyone's favourite underdog at Eurovision: every year we're rooting for them to make the final, and every year brings only disappointment.  Valentina's making her third consecutive attempt with yet another Siegel-penned song, which is just not strong enough to get her to the final.  Of course it would be great if she overcame the odds, but this is just too dated to succeed.  It's a variation on a Bond theme, but if we're talking Bond-style-themes then there is a much better one in the second semi-final.  Oh, and what's with the English language?  I heard the Italian version which improved the song 100%.  This will be Valentina's final year; let's just hope that it won't be her country's last attempt. 

Qualifier: NO

 

 

Portugal - "Quero Ser Tua" - Suzy

Every Portuguese ESC entry is a missed opportunity, and here comes another one.  I understand there was a bit of a hoo-ha (a Quero Ser Hoo-ha in fact) when this won the national final.  This song's like the Lambada reinvented as a World Cup 2014 song.  It's very catchy and likeable, however her delivery is a bit too cabaret for my liking, and I can't see it progressing to the final.  Unless everyone gets bored with all the ballads and the intensity.

Qualifier: NO

 

 

Netherlands – “Calm After The Storm” – The Common Linnets

Ilse de Lange and Waylon make up the Common Linnets.  This gentle country/roots number is the most 'polite' song this year, and I've never heard a song title sung more quietly.  I really don't have a clue how this one will do: it's less-is-more, which can do well, but it's maybe just a little too 'less' for the general viewing public who may find the song a little too sleepy/boring on first listen, as it is a slow burner rather than an instant hit.  I'm hoping that they might stick a bit more vocal oomph into the live version and I think that might be enough to get it to the final.  The Netherlands are taking Eurovision seriously again, and I think they should be rewarded for that.

Qualifier: YES

 

Montenegro - "Moj Svijet" - Sergej Cetkovic

This guy has the same deep, rich vocal tones as Zeljko Joksimovic - close your eyes and you'd think it was him singing.  This has all the ingredients of a successful Balkan ballad at Eurovision, a very popular genre over recent years, and for that reason alone I can see it doing well.  In the absence of Serbia and Croatia, it will finally be Montenegro's time in the spotlight, and this (more conventional entry than their last couple of efforts) should effortlessly qualify to the final. 

Qualifier: YES

 

 

Hungary – “Running” – Andras Kallay-Saunders

It's very interesting that the first semi-final draw is topped and tailed by two of this year's biggest favourites. 

 

I always think that Hungary and Iceland are the two countries most deserving of a long-overdue ESC win.  Hungary is celebrating 20 years in ESC this year and wouldn't it be a nice anniversary present if they could bring it home with this song?  "Running" is certainly one of this year's favourites.  If you played this song to anyone they wouldn't think it was a 'Eurovision' song - it just sounds like a contemporary chart hit.  That's what I like about Hungary at ESC - they ditch the preconceived notions and just send what they like.  The subject matter is rather dark for a Eurovision entry, however I can't really see this being an issue when the majority of viewers/voters don't have English as their first language. 

This is a good, contemporary song, but lacking the greatness of "Sound Of Our Hearts" which still remains my favourite Hungarian entry.   

Qualifier: YES

 

So my foolish predictions for the first semi-final: Armenia, Latvia, Sweden, Russia, Azerbaijan, Ukraine, Belgium, Netherlands, Montenegro and Hungary to progress from semi-final 1.